< class="pagetitle">Archive for the “excerpts” Category

That doesn’t count the revision I did on the first 10,000 words, so not bad, I think. Here are some of them:

She cocked her head. Another sound. Deeper. Not trickling, more like . . .
“Finally, you see the light!” Jerry’s voice came from the other side of her now. He had completed most of the circuit of the room.
“Do you hear that?” The sound came again, low, almost a vibration.
He stilled, his candlelight lapping hers, the murmur of the water, quiet. The faint sounds of the workers in the other room filtered through the door.
More like a moan.
A chink of concrete crumbled from the ceiling and plopped into the water.
“Lian.”
She held up her candle. A long, branched crack crinkled the ceiling. Had that been there before?
The moan came again, and a second chunk fell.
“Lian!” Jerry splashed across the room.

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